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(#105) Joan S (Middleburg, FL)
8/27/1987 in Chattanooga, TN  EVENT: 14th Annual Tennessee State Al-Anon Convention  TYPE: Al-Anon, Female, Story

Joan has 22 years in Al-anon. Got to know and spend time with Lois Wilson, co-founder of Al-anon. Was a Panel 16 delegate. Methodist who only had two kids. Had a wonderful childhood. Born in Canada. Never noticed alcoholism. Very insecure and under weight. They called her Olive Oil. Married at 20 to a Scotch and was back home two years later. Knew it was wrong going down the aisle. Took 6 years to get a divorce. Then met a distinguished southern gentleman dentist. Married 6 months later having seen him just four times. He was in the last stages of alcoholism. Courted by phone - hours per call. She thought it was special for her and found later it is what drunks do. Honeymoon in Jamaica with too much free booze. Tried many ways to stop his drinking. Later spent long nights waiting for him in the dark closets of the mind. The loneliest time of her life. Hunted bottles as a hobby. Followed him around town. Cried, begged, pleaded and screamed - obsessed. No one she could talk to. Alienated from his family. He tried to stop by using Librium but he forged the Rx and abused it. He wanted to move back with his ex-wife and children and sent Joan back to Canada. She wanted to kill him. Cried all the way home. Hurt so bad, ashamed and six months pregnant. Knew nothing of Spiritual life but she was at her bottom. Her husband called next day. He wanted her back and "we" went "back" to AA in closed meetings. Took notes so he wouldn't miss anything. Did it all wrong until she went to Al-anon "for her husband". Hated it to begin with - all little old ladies with gray hair and smiles. Felt the waves of love and that kept her coming back. Husband had a slip for three days but she knew now how to handle it. Joan went back to Al-anon with a new pair of eyes.

(1 hr 5 min) (15.1 MB) (id#105)