Sober 19 years since 10/4/1996, she was raised in Indiana with an alcoholic city bus driver dad and a "rage-aholic" raised on a farm, factory worker mother who was 41 when Cheryl was born.
The first time she drank for effect at 14, she was at a girlfriend's house, the mother passed out, they decided to take the mother's new car. They got back safe but got in trouble. That started a long pattern of problem drinking.
But drinking was not a big part of those early years.
Her parents insisted she move out as soon as she graduated High School.
Then the drinking began. She got pregnant, unmarried and afraid to tell her mother. Though she did tell her, she lost the baby.
She always worked but thought what she needed was a man. She got married and had two sons but the drinking escalated now augmented with other substances.
Though she wanted to be a good mother, she did not know how.
In her 20's she walked away from her husband and her two boys. She has always regretted that decision.
She met another man. She never married an alcoholic man. They moved to Georgia to get away from her mother and family. But the rage, anger and drinking sent him to the emergency room.
They parted ways and she went back to Indiana and her first AA meeting in 1983 at age 30.There were a bunch of old people and none had less than 10 years. They were happy, she was miserable, they detoxed her but she was not ready to quit. Maybe they could teach her how to drink?
She moved back with the man she left in Atlanta. She stayed sober three months going to REBOS in Smyrna.
She started getting somewhat serious in 1993 and got a male sponsor, Frank, on the advice of his wife. He took her through the steps with sometimes brutal honesty. By 3 years she thought she had it all together.
She made a conscious decision to violate the principles and drank again. Emotionally a mess and drinking she could not get drunk. Frank told her she needed a different solution.
She has been sober ever since.